Friday, 25 January 2013

Can You Reach My Friend?

A heartfelt poem I wrote a while back. I hope it inspires you J

I watch my niece snore softly beside me
and wish the world could be as peaceful as her face
it's 3.48 am and I'm wide awake,
worried by my wakefulness, and in the process, pushing sleep farther away
I'm worried about something else too, someone else actually
he has the most beautiful soul I've seen anyone possess
sadly though, he doesn't know
in him I see a friend, a brother, a protector, a confidante, and so much more
sadly again, he doesn't believe
My friend, he has been wounded
me, I have been bleeding
bleeding because I've been where he is now and the memories of that place, that time, have pried open a well of emotions better forgotten
I can't stop bleeding, until he decides to let the wounds heal
The shackles of pain, lifelong pain, rejection, loneliness, and heartbreak, embrace him in a web of discouragement and confusion
tired of fighting, seeing no reason to fight, he's let the web tangle on
thinking, it doesn't matter, who cares anyway?

can you reach my friend and tell him to let it go?
the past doesn't deserve such attention
That we can only be held bound by something, someone, only as long as we allow it
tell him that if he'll only look beyond the veil of all that he grapples with
there is a life full of butterflies, flowers, blue skies and laughter
tell him that all he's been through, only serves as preparation for where God's taking him

God. He doesn't think God's dealt fair with him. If only he can see the big picture. If only we all can.
I speak not because I understand, but because I've been there
There are times when I want to claw at the sky, times when I've doubted if truly God means me well,
there are times when Ive asked questions too: Why me, why now, how long, when?
I've found solace in not knowing, 'cos with that comes the grace to surrender to a power greater than mine

my friend; he is going through some
and I cry 'cos I can't be there
sometimes the best thing you can do for those you care about,
is to stay away
you being there, listening, soothing, fussing
may end up masking the need that runs so deep
and bring about some semblance of healing to a wound that tears open again once you are gone
Grief is good,
it helps us put things back in order and gives a deeper meaning to this ephemeral existence of ours
pain is good
It indicates that something is wrong somewhere, it screams 'I need attention'
as much as I wish it, I can't imagine a world without pain
'cos pain it is, that keeps us real

I've been praying for my friend, asking God to halt the onslaught just a little while
so he can catch his breath
but then it dawns on me
only the goldsmith knows when gold is heated enough, to be brought out of the fire
So now I pray, Lord hold his hand while he passes through the fire
bear him up so he doesn't come out scarred but purified

My friend, he makes me cry
I see his future and all he can be
He sees his past and all he never was, all he could have become
You know, ultimately, we are responsible for whatever we become
No matter where we grew up, how we did, what we went through, who hurt us, who didn't, what opportunities we had or never did
today is all we have, that's why it's called 'The Present'
it's a gift we all should be glad to have
We could live it wishing things were different
or we could decide to do, be, live
in the moment, here, now
Let's not pay so much attention to what we didn't do right
and spend so much time trying to right it,
that the gift of today and those whom we hold dear, gently slip away

If peradventure you reach my friend,
please tell him everything is going to be okay
that god is tugging at the leash and he should pay attention
That to Quando, I say, when he's ready
and to the plan, he can still use my savings account
About Obalende, that I'll be praying for her and she'll be just fine
I'm sorry I'm sending YOU on an encrypted errand
But my friend, you see, will understand

It's 4.54 am, my niece just farted and was courteous enough to wake up and say 'sorry aunty'
I wish the world were as carefree as she
If you decide you will reach my friend
Tell him everything I've said
but also let him know that while he heals
I'll be here, I'll wait, I'll pray, I'll hope, I'll believe
that God will make all things beautiful in its time
While he heals...
I'll bleed, hell, I'm bleeding
but tell him not to worry, I've got dressing
and something else I just discovered tell him,
Tell him that
I don't run out of blood

©Naomi Lucas


Felix Obi said...

Nice...for me?

Naomi Lucas said...

Thanks Felix.

Eh, not really, lol.